st willibrord


Born: 658AD

Died: 739AD

Religion: Catholic

Skill Level: Sainthood

Bonus Power: Feast of St Willibrord

About Saint Willibrord

Willibrord began his career in religious faith in Northumbria as a missionary saint. If you have ever been to Northumbria, then you will know that even to this day, there is still not much else to do.

He became known as the Apostle to the Frisians, having just been pipped to the post of Apostle to the Gentiles which was claimed by his arch-rival Saul, following his Oscar-winning role in the film production, The Road to Damascus. This sainthood was passed blessing when Willibrord passed his test on the fifth attempt out in the Netherlands.

He soon became the first Bishop of Utrecht having won the local egg and spoon race and lived in Echternach, Luxembourg until he died in 739AD.

The Makings of a Saint

What is known of Willibrord before his sainthood is limited due to the lack of social media accounts. Bits of his story are subject to scrutiny, like how he persuaded Roger Moore to take up his role as 007 after his performance of the saint in the tv-series The Saint. Also, the suggestion that he invented the world, thighs has since been denied by the residence of the Vatican.

Born in 658AD, he was raised by his father and immediately shoved into the Abbey of Ripon, so he could focus on this fetish for gathering acorns. Whilst withdrawn from the world he managed to build a small oratory near Humber which he dedicated to his idol Saint Andrew, who at the time was leading goal scorer for Preston North End, who Willibrord supported.

Impressed with his skills in construction, the kings and nobles commissioned him to build a church, which was later ruled by Alcuin an English Scholar at the time.

By the time the church was built Willibrord was aged 20 and he then moved into the Abbey of Rath Melsigi as they offered cheaper rent and soup in the mornings.

It is during this point in County Carlow, that the facts become a little hazy around Willibrord’s life. He resided there till the age of 32, in which, he acquired a heavy Irish accent and mastered the Irish jig.

The Passage to Europe

Willibrord was sent to Europe to spread the word of God to those less educated and followed pagan traditions. The first port of call the Frisians who lived on the North Sea coast of Netherlands and Germany. His warm Irish accent went down well with the Frisians that took to the word of God like a duck to water. This was to lead to Willibrord’s biggest achievement as he set a course for Rome, where Pope Sergius asked him to preach the Gospel of the Gentiles. Willibrord smelt revenge and saw his chance to outshine his enemy Saul with the addition of fanciful Irish jigging incorporated into his stage act. Witnesses are quoted as “he made haste like a rat up a drainpipe”.

In 698, Willibrord established himself in the Abbey of Echternach for 20 years until the king of the Frisians retook the land and burned the churches and showed no mercy unto the many missionaries in the area. Willibrord survived the ordeal and made his way to the Frankish territory with his monks.

The life of Saint Willibrord during this time and up until his death alludes the history books, in 719, 20 years prior to his passing, it is said that he was spotted sharing a morning coffee with Roger Moore and both laughing at the irony of Willibrord becoming the real saint.